Earlier this month I had the distinct pleasure of spending a few days in British Columbia, presenting four de-escalation training sessions to the lovely staff at the Burnaby Public Library. Living in Washington State, I have always felt a connection to our neighbors up north and every visit across the border is one I relish.

To say that relations between our two countries are strained right now is a massive understatement. But to be on Canadian soil, talking to staff about compassion, kindness, and cooperation, the divisions and borders that separate us became arbitrary. I find more common ground than differences with folks, regardless of where they come from, something I wish my current government understood.

I thank my new Burnaby friends for the generosity and hospitality and hope that we can see each other again soon.

Situational Awareness & Non-verbal Signals

Situational awareness is essential for maintaining a safe and welcoming space for patrons and staff alike. One helpful tool can be the use of non-verbal signals, simple gestures that allow staff to support one another when a situation arises.

At a branch I worked with, staff developed an effective signal to solve a specific challenge. While they were already good at backing each other up during escalated incidents, they struggled with situations where a patron was calm but lingering too long or steering the conversation into personal territory. To a colleague across the room it might have seemed like a typical interaction, but up close the employee might be uncomfortable and in need of a graceful exit.

To address this, the team created a subtle but effective signal: placing a closed fist on the opposite shoulder. When a colleague noticed the signal, they would step in by calling the employee away on an "urgent matter" or swapping places. Staff appreciated having this tool. Although the signal was not used often, when needed it was a huge relief.

However, the success of nonverbal communication depends on keeping it simple. Another library developed a three-tiered hand signal system, one for "everything is fine," another for "monitor this situation," and a third for "call law enforcement". While well-intentioned, it was not effective. Too many signals led to confusion and as a result staff did not use them.

The key is to choose one or two clear but discreet signals that everyone can remember and recognize. Practicing them in staff meetings ensures they become second nature, making them a valuable resource when needed.

New Year, New Faces

In July of last year I had the distinct pleasure of presenting my de-escalation training in Santa Monica to a consortium of library staff from across the Golden State, thanks to the fine folks at CALL (California Libraries Learn), of whom I owe deep and abiding gratitude for the opportunities they afforded me in 2024. Attendees of my training know that I strive for an experience where everyone is welcome to raise questions, share their stories, or otherwise contribute to the conversation. Well, this Santa Monica session was unlike any other in that regard. Any time I posed a question, a singular voice from the back of the room was ready with an articulate, impressive answer. Over and over again, this voice would expand on a theme or provide a valuable addendum to a talking point. I have never experienced quite such enthusiasm or engagement before.

After the session the voice from the back of the room came up and introduced herself. Julia Parsons is an Assistant Director at a library in Southern California. Her professional background and personal experience differ significantly from mine and that perspective–coupled with her intelligence and energy–convinced me that we needed to work together to expand the capabilities of Safer Libraries. For the last several months she and I have been working towards folding her experience into our programs. Starting this year, Julia will begin presenting her own training, focusing on areas of management, inclusivity, boundaries, and tackling stress. In addition she will present with me on de-escalation topics, including at the upcoming Texas Library Association Conference in April. I am ecstatic with the work she has contributed thus far and I am eager to get her in front of library staff so they too can be wowed by her expertise. I would like to turn the next few paragraphs of the newsletter over to Julia so that she can introduce herself and demonstrate what she brings to the organization. 

I’ve been happily married for 12 years to a husband who knows me better than I know myself—and we share our home in Ventura County with our dog and cat, who run the place. I work for a library in the area that I absolutely adore, but my path to librarianship wasn’t exactly a straight line. I was drawn to so many topics, people, and places that I couldn’t pick just one to focus on. My husband, seeing me stuck in my indecision, suggested I talk to a librarian he’d met. She told me something that changed my life: librarians don’t have to choose just one thing. We research everything. We explore every topic because they all matter when you’re helping people. That was the moment I knew this was the career for me.

With a bachelor’s degree in ethnic studies, focusing on Latino and Indigenous communities, and a master’s in library and information science with an emphasis on public libraries and administration, I set my sights on leadership. For me, library administration is about protecting the fundamental freedoms to read and access information while ensuring libraries remain safe and inclusive spaces. These principles are the heartbeat of our profession. But let’s be honest: working with the public can be unpredictable, especially for women, minorities, and other underrepresented groups. That’s why I attended Rick’s talk. His insights on de-escalation—approaching tense situations with compassion and empathy—were game-changing.

What I brought to Rick’s talk was my perspective. While his advice was spot-on, sometimes it takes hearing from someone whose experiences align more closely with yours to make those lessons hit home. As a woman and a part of minority groups, I’m passionate about how diverse perspectives shape safety and security in libraries. We’re not here to police the space; we’re here to make sure everyone feels welcome, safe, and included, so they want to come back. That’s the beauty of libraries—they’re for everyone, and it’s our job to ensure that means everyone. Rick was teaching the epitome of that and I had to reach out and try to help wherever I could.